Victims of domestic violence in the Wilmington area have been finding solace in Domestic Violence Shelter and Services Inc. for the past 26 years.
When you step into the main office, you see that it is not a conventional office setting. They have taken an old house and remolded it to fit their needs as an office space.
The office is open to walk-ins during regular hours of operation.
"If someone calls and needs help after business hours, the call is sent to the rape crisis line," said Bonnie Iler, director of services and outreach. "From there a staff member who is on call is contacted."
Iler said every situation is unique and each victim has different needs.
"Someone may come in and say that they need a plane ticket to Alaska," said Iler. "We just make sure they have support waiting for them wherever they decide to go. We talk about options and safety. This is the outlet to figure out what's best for the situation."
The shelter can hold up to 19 people and is available to women and children. However, if the shelter is full, there is always somewhere for a victim to go.
"Some victims may not be ready to leave their abuser," said Iler. "We can do things like give them a cell phone that they can hide and use anytime they need."
The organization works with other counties in the state and will transfer victims to other shelters if need be.
"The average stay in the shelter is about 6 weeks," said Iler.
During a stay at the shelter, the residents make goals. These plans can include things like getting a job and figuring out what the next move will be, where to go next.
While the women are staying in the shelter, they are required to go an empowerment support group run by the organization. The group meets on Tuesday evenings from 6-8 p.m. and Thursday mornings from 10-11:30 a.m. Child care is provided during the Tuesday evening sessions. These groups are also offered to families that are impacted by domestic violence.
Iler also pointed out that it is important for staff to be around the residential areas at all times.
"Victims get used to the chaos of abuse and sometimes don't know how to live in a situation that isn't chaotic," said Iler.
The organization runs three thrift stores called Vintage Values. They are located at 609 Castle St., 413 South College Rd., and 5226 South College Rd. The Castle St. location is open 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Monday through Saturday, and the other two are open 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Monday through Saturday.
The idea for Vintage Values was born when Mary Ann Lama, executive director of the shelter, put out a call to the community. She asked for clothing donations for the women and children staying in the shelter.
"Sometimes victims have to leave so quickly that they can't really bring anything with them," said Iler. "Mary Ann was just asking for some donations, and the response blew her away. People were bringing so much stuff that we realized we could open a thrift shop."
The stores are staffed with 8-10 paid part-time and full-time staff members. The rest of the workers are volunteers. There is usually an average of 20 volunteers per month.
So far this year, volunteers have logged over 11,000 hours with a monthly average of 1,000 hours.
Ken Morris, a retired US Coast Guard captain and Wilmington resident, has been volunteering for the organization since 2006. He was inspired to work in domestic violence aid when a co-worker's daughter was killed by her husband in a domestic dispute, after which the murderer took his own life.
"I asked myself how can I make something good come out of that," said Morris. "That's when I started volunteering, and I've been doing it ever since."
Most of Morris' service work consists of transporting stock between the different Vintage Values locations and moving furniture to and from the shelter.
October is domestic violence awareness month. Every year Dianne Lomax, director of operations and development, organizes an event called Take Back the Night.
Take Back the Night is held in front of the Alton Lennon Federal Building on Water St. in downtown Wilmington.
"This is an opportunity for victims, survivors and loved ones to march in unity against domestic violence," said Lomax. "This is just one of the many events that we will be having in October. We also hold law enforcement training, an all-star basketball tournament and Civil Workplace Summit, all of which can be found on our website."
The office, located at 2901 Market St., is open 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Monday through Friday. Victims of domestic violence, friends and family are welcome to visit during those times.
To learn more visit their website at www.domesticviolence-wilm.org
