Advice from Sally Seahawk


Genevieve Guenther

Sally Seahawk, Staff Writer

One of my friends is dating a guy that has accepted a job in Colorado, but she has accepted a job in Charlotte after graduation. How can I tell her that it’s probably not going to work out?

Sometimes in relationships, it can be hard for people to focus on what the future holds when they are so caught up in how things are going right now. This might be what your friend is experiencing with her boyfriend. I would have a conversation with her and point out a factor in the relationship that she might not have thought about yet. Just give her the opportunity to vent to you about it and evaluate where her relationship stands in regard to both her and her boyfriend’s future jobs. She will appreciate you wanting the best for her and not wanting to see her get hurt in the future. In the end, she has to follow her heart and do what she thinks is best for her. But at least you were a good friend and expressed your concern for her and allowed her to talk it through with you.

I have two different friend groups that I hang out with, but I’m having trouble balancing my time between them. How do I manage my time better with my friends?

There are two different ways you can handle this. You could try to combine the two friend groups if you think they would merge well. This way you wouldn’t have to choose between friend groups when you are wanting to hang out. But, if you don’t think they would merge well and get along, you should try to plan out time with both groups. If you plan out the times you will spend with them, you will feel less stressed about having to spontaneously choose between who you want to hang out with. It is important for you to make both friend groups aware that you are not always free, and you may have to turn down an invitation to hang out every once in a while. Planning your time will also help you balance the two groups as evenly as possible. That way you can see who is getting most of your time and where you are lacking. It can be a really helpful way to balance a schedule.

My roommate has been getting messier than usual the past couple of weeks. She hasn’t cleaned her dishes or the living room area at all. What can I do to address this with her?

I would confront her nicely about it and just express your concerns to her. I’m sure she means no harm by it and she might not even realize that she has started to be messier. This part of the semester is really busy for everyone, especially because of the hurricane, and she might be really focused on her school work. You could just ask her about school and other aspects of her life to see what is going on and what she has been focusing on recently. This would be a good way to find out if she is slacking in cleaning the house because she has other things to worry about. If you nicely bring to her attention that she has progressively gotten messier, you might find that she had no idea that she had been doing that. After you have a conversation with her about it I would give her around a week to see if she starts cleaning up again and then if not, I would confront her again about the situation.