Advice from Sally Seahawk


Genevieve Guenther

Sally Seahawk, Staff Writer

I’m a freshman this year on campus and I am having trouble with my roommate. She always leaves the room in a mess and is very inconsiderate of me and my space. What should I do?

I would start by confronting your roommate and just letting her know what your concerns are. She might not know that she is creating a problem and if she becomes aware of the situation, it may result in her consciously becoming more considerate of you and your space. If this doesn’t seem to have a positive impact on the situation, you could also let your RA know about the problem you are experiencing. You and your roommate most likely had to sign a roommate agreement during your move in time and some of the cleanliness issues that you are dealing with may have been addressed on that. You could set up a meeting with your roommate and RA if you would feel more comfortable having someone with authority present in the confrontational situation. The most important thing is to just approach the situation with kindness so that this small problem doesn’t create a bigger, unnecessary problem between you and your roommate.

This is my first semester at UNCW and I thought I would love it, but it just doesn’t feel like home to me. I haven’t made many friends and I’m thinking about transferring. Do you think it’s too soon to make this decision?

You could immediately feel like UNCW isn’t the right place for you, and that’s okay. Don’t feel like you have to love it just because it seems like everybody else does. You know yourself better than anyone else does, so if you don’t feel happy in the environment UNCW has to offer, then transferring to another university might be the right choice for you. However, while you are still attending UNCW, you could do some things that will make your experience more enjoyable. You could consider joining clubs so that you would have the opportunity to meet more people who have similar interests as you. You could also take advantage of your UNI 101 class because those students are in similar situations as you and they are most likely looking for new friends as well. While I don’t think it’s too soon to make a decision about transferring schools, I do think you should try to make the most of your time here at UNCW, even if that does mean for only one semester.

My boyfriend is thinking about joining a fraternity and I’m scared that this might jeopardize our relationship. Any advice?

This is a common problem that relationships face when entering college. I think you should start by expressing your concerns to your boyfriend and he should understand why you have these concerns. However, at the same time, as his girlfriend, you have to respect his individual decisions and support him through his college journey. Just because he is joining a fraternity does not mean he is looking for a way to get out of the relationship. He will find a community of friends in the fraternity that he could possibly have for life and that could be important to him. The fraternity will have numerous functions that you will be able to attend with him so that you can experience this with him. Don’t imagine the worst situation, or you might find yourself just waiting for the “bad part” to come instead of enjoying the better parts. There are many relationships that face this problem and many of them make the most of the experience and enjoy it together while they can.