It is no secret that the threat of sexual assault exists on college campuses; however, not every college campus has a resource for victims of sexual assault like the CARE program at UNC Wilmington.

CARE, which stands for the Collaboration for Assault Response and Education, is distinct from the counseling centers both at UNCW and at other colleges in its specific mission to help students, faculty and staff who are victims of sexual assault, stalking or relationship violence. CARE provides help by being a support system for the victim’s needs in the aftermath of whatever event brings them to the office.

According to the Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN), out of 1000 rapes about 994 perpetrators will walk free. Out of those perpetrators, about 310 are reported to the police and only 54 of those will go to jail. These numbers beg the question: Why do so many sexual assaults go unreported? Ryane Miller, the lead victim advocate for CARE, says that many victims feel that telling the story aloud to another person makes it real. It makes victims accept what happened to them, which is no easy task for a victim–especially if the assault was recent. Self-blame is also common among victims who are sexually assaulted or are involved in relationship violence, which usually keeps the victims quiet about their story.

One sexual assault victim, who would like to remain anonymous due to the subject matter, says she reported the crime because she wanted to prevent anything like this from happening to another person. This victim was date raped by a good friend that she had known for over ten years, and she admits to never thinking that drinking at a party would lead to her assault. Miller explains that 80-85 percent of sexual assaults are typically committed by someone you know and trust.

As for choosing whether to speak up about the crime, the victim said, “I originally felt that I didn’t want to ruin his life. I know his family, he knows mine. I didn’t know what would happen if word got out. I wanted to keep our social lives the same, but I quickly realized that wasn’t possible.” Miller says that this feeling is completely normal and quite common.

When a victim first comes to CARE, the staff is there to simply show support and to listen. After sharing their story, it is the staff’s responsibility to discuss the options for the victim moving forward. Sharing their story is a huge step for a victim and CARE recognizes that. Miller says that often, “it is easier to say, ‘I haven’t been raped’ and continue to try and function normally instead of sharing their story.”

However, sharing stories can make a major impact on successfully working through trauma. The same sexual assault victim recalls sharing her story with CARE; she says, “It was a huge relief after. Like a weight had been lifted off my chest. They listened and didn’t pressure me to report it or anything. They let me take my time. I’m eternally grateful for that.”

When victims share their stories, the first person they talk to can make a lot of difference in their recovery from assault or abuse, depending on how the listener reacts. Miller explains how important it is when approached by a victim of trauma to keep calm. She says, “Don’t panic, blame or make any promises that everything is going to be okay. Start by believing. Don’t ever assume. Keep your outside neutral.” Simply put–listen. The next step after that would be to inform them about or help them identify their resources. Continue to support them by walking with them to the CARE office or sit with them while they make the phone call. Support is what it is all about.

While CARE’s main responsibility is to serve as a support system for victims of interpersonal violence or abuse, CARE is also here to help prevent these events from happening in the first place. Some of the most effective preventative measures that can be taken are to use the buddy system and always be aware of your surroundings. For example, if you go to a party with three friends, leave with all three friends. Get your own beverages and do not accept drinks from anyone else. Ultimately, these violent acts can be prevented by individuals working together to take care of one another. Miller says that the Seahawk community needs to “come together and be supportive. You never know who is a survivor.”

The Collaboration for Assault Response and Education is located in DePaolo Hall on the second floor across from the Student Health Center. Their business hours are Monday-Friday from 8am-5pm. CARE can be contacted at (910) 962-CARE during business hours and (910) 512-4821 after hours.