Life’s Little Lessons: Part 1

Before I had the utmost pleasure of being a Seahawk, I spent two years as a Sea Devil at Cape Fear Community College (actually it was more like three years, but it really flew by, okay?).

Among my courses at this fine establishment, I was required to take an introductory literature class, which didn’t seem to pose a big challenge. The teacher was cool and the class was interesting for the most part, but there was this one guy who got on everybody’s last nerve, jumping up and down on it until it was all but demolished.

Every day he wore a black trench coat and Buddy Holly glasses ($100 says there was just glass in the frames). He spent most of the class talking about the utter genius of Depeche Mode, when he had no reason do do so.

The worst part about this fellow, who will remain nameless (pretty much because I can’t remember his name), is that he could never be convinced that he wasn’t completely right about everything 100% of the time. He looked down his nose at the class and their opinions.

I quickly realized this and began to purposefully argue with the points he made, whether I felt strongly about them or not, just to get him fired up. It got funny sometimes, although I was a little worried that one day he was going to show up at school with a sawed off shotgun in that foreboding black trench coat of his and put an end to my meddling once and for all. Plus, my teacher had noticed what I was doing, and he quietly asked me to stop one day at I Love New York Pizza.

If you’ve made it this far, you’re probably asking “Hey, Brad, are you going to get to the point of all this anytime soon, or should I go grab a snack and come back later?”

Here’s my point, kiddies: you are going to encounter pretentious people throughout the course of life. There will always be people that are convinced that they are right and you are wrong, and from time to time, it will be a big challenge to deal with. You have to take people like this in stride and not let them affect you too much. It’s okay to have fun with them, like trying to convince a film major that “Back to the Future” is the greatest film in the history of cinema, but just know that in the long run, it’s not a big deal. Let them think that they have convinced you that their way is better, and then laugh at them with your friends when they walk away. Just don’t let them see you, because they really hate to be laughed at outright, and then they might shoot you.

Oh yeah, “Back to the Future” is the greatest thing that’s ever happened or ever will happen to cinema, and I don’t care what any of you have to say about it, because I’m right and you are wrong.